Modern Living

I'm not sure why I keep on using the self check-outs in grocery stores. I am a child of the Internet, so it's true I avoid personal interaction like the plague. There are so many potential pitfalls, especially when you're living in a city whose major language you speak in sort of a garbled Babelfish translation... at best. Bags? No bags? How to pay? All questions requiring more involved answers than the quebecois oui I've perfected the right quack for.

So this automated thing works fine... until it doesn't. Some veggies can't be found on the menu, some need a clerk for some reason and somethings won't just scan once. No, they scan over and over again. And then the soothing lady voice tells you firmly, but repeatedly to put the item in the bag. But there's no item! No delete button! NO ITEM GODDAMNIT, maybe you'll just RUN and get ANOTHER can of tomatoes so she'll SHUT UP.

Which is to say that I battled the forces of technology yet again tonight. A can of tomatoes was already in the bag when the thing beeped and scanned a second time. But then as I helplessly looked on, the second, phantom can mysteriously disappeared from my bill. Looks like the machines have learned empathy before learning how to maim, kill and overthrow their human masters. Take that, James Cameron.